Do you ever feel that things are spiraling out of control, your dreams seem elusive or discouragement and lethargy have become your regular companion. Are you dissatisfied with your level of productivity, inability to meet deadlines?
These and many more are sometimes challenges created by habits which we grapple with as people especially if you are someone who is trying to maximize destiny.
One of the most worthwhile, yet strenuous and frustrating pursuits we can engage in is the pursuit of mastery of good habits. They are simply hard to conquer. It is easy slip into terrible habits of thoughts and actions. While I’m not making an attempt at a quick fix, I believe a change in the way we think can start the process of change no matter how long.
Let’s be realistic. You have spent over 5-10 years acting in a manner you now see shortchanges your potential. Suddenly you wake up to the realization of its destructive effect. You then decide you must change in 2 weeks. Your unfruitful attempt at change frustrates you and that is normal.
Here is what you should consider and it hit me like a lightning bolt the day I heard it from Olakunle Soriyan – Every Action is a rehearsal for mastery.
Those who develop addictions fail to understand they didn’t suddenly get to a compulsive state. Every wrong action strengthened the attraction for the next one. Over time, the brain which is very plastic learnt that it is the way of pleasure to do wrong. While they may deeply feel its wrong, the brain’s neural pathway for that behavior is already well established, explaining the feeling of helplessness
But never accept that you can’t change. Not everybody ends up in rehab or messes up their lives. Testimonies abound of people who have gone on to lead great lives despite early struggles with crippling habits. All you need do is maintain the attitude that change is possible.
Because habits begin at the level of thought, I advise you start by changing the way you think about yourself. First accept, you are not your habit neither are you helpless or a slave of self. The struggle might be long but if you believe it’s possible, you will overcome. All things are possible to him who believes. You are not doomed for a lifetime of moral struggle, depression, abuse, fear or discouragement.
Attack your wrong thinking before it becomes a feeling, before that feeling becomes an action and the action develops into a habit. Character is the sum total of our habits. We are what we repeatedly do (not our intentions). Start the work of change moment by moment, focus on daily victories. To change your life, you must change something that you do every day.
I share Stephen Covey’s conviction here, “I believe that there are parts to human nature that cannot be reached by either legislation or education, but require the power of God to deal with.” Ezra Benson said, “The world would change human behaviour, but Christ can change human nature.”
This might just be the time to admit your helplessness, let go of your pride and ask God for help. If you can change yourself, you would have by now.
As you go about your daily life and before you take a step, always remember – every action is a rehearsal for mastery. You sure don’t want to be mastered by the wrong habit.
I believe in you.
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About Layi Adeyemi
Layi is a consummate speaker, author, trainer and peak performance coach. As a management consultant, he is currently involved in helping various SMEs realize their full potential in the development of their human resources and in achieving business growth.